The Lecture

A cop sees an older gentleman staggering slightly down the street. It's 1:00 in the morning. He pulls over for a chat.

"Good evening, sir," the cop says. "Is everything OK?"

"Why yes, officer, thank you," the man says, speaking a bit thickly.

"Where are you headed?" the cop asks.

"I'm on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body," the man says with certainty.

"Sir, it's 1:00 in the morning," the cop says. "Who would be giving a lecture on that topic at this hour?"